is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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