He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
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