You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Randomize