therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
