It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
