How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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