So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
