i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
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