apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Randomize
