Quick, to the slutcave!
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
