It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
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