oh god the rape fog is back!
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
