I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
