Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
