He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
