I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize