Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I understand Curling. That high.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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