I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
