so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
