Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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