it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
