How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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