Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
