He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize