Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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