Just mADE A PArabola og urine
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Randomize