He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Randomize
