i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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