you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Just puked most of my soul out..
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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