Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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