I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Randomize