I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
