Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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