Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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