is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
