We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
There r osticjed everywhere
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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