When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
