I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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