just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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