I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
