Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
