My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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