I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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