we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
