Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
So squirting runs in the family.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
