THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
