Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Randomize
