these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
