i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Randomize