I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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